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Beware the Jagrafess, my son!

I've just been out to the doctor to get my annual 'flu1 vaccination. I qualify for a free one every year because of my asthma, and have been having them for six years now: ever since I actually did get 'flu over Christmas 1999, and realised that a small amount of forward planning and a slight prick in the arm was more than worth going through each year in order to avoid it.

So, the jab went fine. I hardly felt it, and that's another 'flu-free winter to look forward to. But while I was there, I noticed the leaflets the NHS have printed up this year to encourage those in vulnerable groups2 to get the injection:

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Let's take a closer look at those little gremlins, shall we?

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Now is that, or is that not, the Jagrafess? Hmm? Is that its goal in the 21st century, then: to take control of Earth through the medium of viral infection? Is that what the NHS are desperately trying to tell us by printing suggestive pictures of it on their literature? Has it had itself cloned and miniaturised a billion times over for an attack not unlike that of the Swarm in The Invisible Enemy? Is it a coincidence that that very story also saw the debut of the lovable K-9, who is set to return to our screens this coming spring? Will he, by then, be deeply involved in a real-life battle against the new and mysterious Jagrafess virus?

And do I now know far more about Doctor Who than I thought I did or ever expected to? I may be protected against the Jagrafess now, but you lot clearly took over my brain some time ago...

1. That's 'flu as in Actual Influenza: not the same as a cold. Even a bad cold.
2. For the record, you qualify if you're over 65, or have kidney disease, diabetes, reduced immunity or any serious chest or heart complaint, including asthma. If that's you, get it! Don't have 'flu.


( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 13th, 2005 12:42 pm (UTC)
Being also a sciencemedia geek, I happen to know that this campaign was running last autumn as well, because I used it in my teaching. So unless they nicked the Jagrafess from the NHS, there might be a small problem with your theory*

*yes I know, timetravel, etc.

On the other hand, both of 'em look rather like the head of a lamprey (nasty jawless parasitic fishthing):
Oct. 13th, 2005 12:47 pm (UTC)
Eep! *jumps away from screen* It's trying to get me!

Mind you, the whole point of the Jagrafess is that it was itself manipulating the world's media, so maybe it has engineered its own presence on 21st century Earth in both the NHS literature and Doctor Who? Maybe it's planned a subtle long-term campaign whereby we are increasingly exposed to its image, until we come to love it and covet it and welcome it with open arms to our juicy and succulent planet?
Oct. 13th, 2005 12:49 pm (UTC)
Or is the Jagrafess merely a mutation of Influenza? :)
Oct. 13th, 2005 01:21 pm (UTC)
Eep! again. It's the dreaded Claw! *runs away*

And perhaps you're right. Maybe it's a giant influenza virus that has grown to 10 trillion times its original size thanks to nuclear radiation?
Oct. 13th, 2005 08:16 pm (UTC)
Don't worry, Penelope! We'll saves ya! :D

Of course it's grown to immense size because of radiation. Doesn't everything? ;)

Oct. 13th, 2005 08:44 pm (UTC)
Yay! icon.

And is that kitten incredibly scary - or incredibly cute? I'm so confused!
Oct. 13th, 2005 09:33 pm (UTC)
Cute I think - was wondering if I could attempt to icon it - would that be OK?
Oct. 14th, 2005 12:34 am (UTC)
*insert maniacal laughter*
Oct. 13th, 2005 05:56 pm (UTC)
I don't know if you recall, but one Hallowe'en, we saw a tv programme with some nutter exposing himself to many "natural bloodsuckers" (hence the Hallowe'en connection, haha, how terribly witty, I can well imagine some programming commissioner slapping himself on the back over that one, bloody schedulers, *mutter* *curse*), including fleas, ticks and lampreys.

He waded around up to his knees in stagnant water, and sure enough, a lamprey soon clamped on to his calf. It was not pretty. *shudder*
Oct. 13th, 2005 06:52 pm (UTC)
Oh, believe me, I've never forgotten! I had forgotten the Halloween connection, but the image of that guy with lampreys trailing from his leg has never left me!
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:16 pm (UTC)
I've never quite understood why anyone one want to die of a surfeit of those.
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:19 pm (UTC)
I thought Vedius Pollio's victims were largely unwilling?
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:29 pm (UTC)
It was not Vedius Pollio I had in mind, but King Henry I (1068-1135) of England, who the chronicles reported as dying from a "surfeit of lampreys," of all things.
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:42 pm (UTC)
Ah! I suppose there's no chance he ate too many, or anything slightly-less-unplesant lke that? I know the Romans liked to have a good munch on a lamprey when they got the chance.
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:57 pm (UTC)
He was, apparently, known for his gluttony where lamphreys were concerned. Which brings me back to my original question - why anyone would have chosen to die of eating those things is beyond me ;)
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:04 pm (UTC)
Still, got to be better than being eaten by them, eh?
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:22 pm (UTC)
Oct. 13th, 2005 02:59 pm (UTC)
Oh, I don't know I think it looks more like a Langolier myself. Though that might just be part of its cunning plan...
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:03 pm (UTC)
Ooh, that thing looks nasty. It appears to have glass teeth! What on earth is it from?
Oct. 13th, 2005 08:23 pm (UTC)
It's a Langolier from the movie of the Stephen King novel "The Langoliers".

The movie itself is low-budget but incredibly tense and atmospheric, until the actual Langoliers themselves turn up, at which point it becomes a little bit silly. But that's right at the end, and it doesn't detract too much from the otherwise near-excellence of the movie, imho.
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:34 pm (UTC)
Who's afraid of the...
Well, maybe some Failed Pop Star has looked into the Eye of the Convenient Plot Device and is leaving the Jagrafess throughout history, pamphlets and popular culture in a self-generating loop designed purely to annoy people who talk about these things on the Internet...

But maybe the Jagrafess is already in control of the media? How else would we explain this amazing news?
Oct. 13th, 2005 03:50 pm (UTC)
Re: Who's afraid of the...
It's the only logical explanation for anything and everything...
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )

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